DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
So don't be alarmed when you go into your bathroom, he's sleeping in the tub with your brothers dinosaurs. also I'll clean up the sticky floor later. (you don't wanna know)
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
Randomize
