It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
He told me to fart on his lap because the vibrations turned him on
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
Is it appropriate to put "Mommy and Daddys shitfaced-ness that led to Aubrey" on a birth announcement?
Well you two just had a kid in the middle of college, I dont think anyone will notice.
Thanks bro
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
Randomize
