Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
I never should have let my cousin and his pregnant girlfriend move in with me. I'm never having sex again. They scare off men more than 'my dream wedding' pin board.
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
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