Just brushed my teeth...forgot we used this toothbrush in bed last night.
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
Randomize
