I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
i gained so much weight this year, i put on my string bikini underwear and couldnt see the string anymore! i hate my life.
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
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