so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
1.) You left the rest of your whiskey here 2.) I drank your whiskey 3.) then made a steam roller out of the bottle 4.) Everything tastes like whiskey
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
Shout out to this stomach virus for helping me prepare for whatever slutty Halloween costume I decide to wear.
I'm basically your average "grandpa stuck in a 28 year old woman's body" - i'm super passionate about retirement and crossing on the walk signal.
and SLEEP god I love sleep
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
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