super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
A homeless man walked up to me at the bar, pointed, and told me to get my shit together. Jesus?
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
I told you when I started the only reason I was gonna coach your kids soccer team was that I could meet all the hot soccer moms. So why are you so mad I slept with your ex?
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
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