eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
Eye surgery went well. Just can't believe it took getting lasers through my eyes to temporarily stop the vivid sex dreams I was having
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
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