just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
Randomize