He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
...you put a chicken patty in my toaster last night..
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
Randomize