well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
Can you please stop fucking every bartender in the city? Just once I want to have a Jack and Coke without fielding questions about your availability.
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
Randomize
