I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
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