We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
wakey wakey hands off snakey
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
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