we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
Randomize
