I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
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