so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
I ripped my favorite bra in half last night while I was undressing in a drunken rage.
What was the rage all about?
He wouldn't stop to let me get McDonald's french fries.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
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