I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
YAS. BRING CRAB.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
