Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
You smell like stripper and shame
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
Well my sober pact lasted almost an hour. Then I did four shots. But in other news, one of those shots I took with a midget. So like I couldn't turn that shit down.
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
Randomize
