so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
If you were a real friend you would have told me you saw me in a porno despite how awkward of a convo it is. You act like I should always know when I'm being recorded.
I could have made money off of that but no you had to wait 2 years to drunkenly tell me this shit.
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
Masturbated before I came into work and now the finger scanner won't clock me in. Fuck Valentines Day.
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Randomize
