Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize