That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
