Get your hand out of your ass!
how did you know my hand was in my ass? Guess where my other hand is..?
In your belly button
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
Randomize
