Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
I'm not really that drunk, but I think vampires should glow in the dark because otherwise it's just unfair
Found more tequila
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
My mind's like "He's a sexist pig" but my uterus is like "YOU SHALL BEAR HIM STRONG CHILDREN"
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
Randomize
