wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
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