once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
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