Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
I woke up covered in BBQ sauce. My hand had "you win" written on it. Do I celebrate?
I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
Randomize
