she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?
You told me to go grocery shopping.
Why was I so drunk last night that I licked the bar and then the bartenders face? Why didn't you stop me? We can never go back there.
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
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