i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
someone get that fucking seahorse.
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
Theres a live mouse in the toilet. Goddamn you this is why I don't party here
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
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