Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
Three questions. How does a tomato drive a car, how does an asparagus play a guitar, and how am I still so high that I chose to watch Veggie Tales?
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
Vodka + horseback riding = vomit in the saddle bags
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
Randomize