I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
He KNOWS ALL THE WORDS TO "JESUS IS MY FRIEND", I swear if he even tries to pull shit with me I'm becoming an actual nun.
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
Randomize