i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
I don't understand how he can't hear himself snoring, but he'll wake up to me sneaking m&m's from my junk food stash beside the bed...
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
We just banged and he's microwaving shrimp noodles and I'm eating tostitos alone in the dark this is why our relationship works
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
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