Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
Randomize
