have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
When I got to his place, he served wine and cheese and made me sit on the balcony while he read his poetry to me. He cockblocked himself.
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
He came up there while i was bartending, ate a salad, told me he wanted to divorce me, then tipped me 10 dollars....
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
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