drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
Fuck this. I'm adopting 12 cats and naming them after the 12 disciples. Maybe Jesus will have sympathy for me then.
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
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