Alcohol only hurts me because he loves me.
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
'allo, good sire. how dost thy day goeth?
oh no. you're at that weird Renaissance Festival thing again, aren't you?
I am an inebriated elf. you may fucketh off.
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize
