I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
Randomize
