Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
it hurts more in the daytime
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The waitress at the airport bar just asked me if I wanted a "to go" beer, hahahahaha OF COURSE I WANT A TO GO BEER.
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
Im crossing my legs while on the toilet. It's like I'm unconsciously thinking "if im going to barf and shit at the same time, Im at least going to do it LIKE A LADY"
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize