i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
I woke up this morning to my house being turned into a bad European dance club at 8:30am. Do you know what "UNS UNS UNS" sounds like at 8:30am? Murder. It sounds like murder.
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
I wrote notes to myself all over my body. "don't yell at cops again" "Cody stole your phone" "you kissed Cody" "vodka shots are bad for your liver" and "cactus pretty" WTF????
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
Randomize
