I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
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I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
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Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
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