Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
So am i just your go-to 'i found a tick on my penis' number?
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
Literally best acid trip ever. Better than sex. At one point she looked over at me, started crying, holds up her hands and said "dinosaur tears of sadness". Craziest roommate ever.
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
Randomize
