shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
MAGGIE IS ON MY COUCH PETTING AN HONEST TO CHRIST ARMADILLO AND SOBBING INTO HOT CHOCHOLATE. WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO TO HER.
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
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