i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
sitting in my room eating a boneless rib tv dinner, and listening to taylor swift's love story, and i sharted. had to finish the ribs and hear the end of the song before i went to the bathroom to wipe.
i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
Got free coffee because I told the guy at starbucks the pleats in his khaki pants made his cock look big.
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
There must be a happy medium universe where you get it on with my girlfriend enough to cause me pain but not a full on cardiac arrest. It's a fine line to tread though.
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
