I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
Randomize
