been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
Randomize