I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
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