I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
Are you jealous of my sweatsuit? It's how I get men on Tinder.
She made me pour olive oil on her.
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
Randomize
