then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
ttyl tear gas
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
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