too bad you live with your parents still
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
I told her Billy Mays couldn't convince me to sleep with her
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
Just re-gained consciousness in the freshman girls dorm. Normally this would be awesome but I'm on the floor surrounded by chicks doing their homework. This makes me uncomfortable but I don't think they know I'm awake yet. If I b-line for the door can you come get me?
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
Randomize
