I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
Turns out I'm like the Wayne Gretzky of hiding cum. Who knew?
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
I woke up on the steps beside a plate of spaghetti and a toilet paper roll ripped in half. And i actually think this day is gonna get better.
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
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