My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
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