Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
The cops found weed in michael jacksons house today...it makes up for the child molesting, I like him more now.
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
you are never too drunk for berry picking
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
Getting a smaller wine glass hasn’t changed the amount I drink—it just means I get more steps each day. Cheers to health!
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