i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
Today I met the neighbor that shares my bedroom wall. When I pointed out my unit, he said, "Oh, that's you? Oh... that's you." I didn't think much of it until I was in bed tonight and I heard him clear his throat. He's. Heard. Everything.
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
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