Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
It was my birthday today and i decided that i am not checking my notifications on facebook so ill feel popular
Wrong number and your a loser
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
If I die, sorry about rent.
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